Cooking for my family through weight loss surgery

Don't be surprised that my husband does 89% of the cooking. I usually get home late and John has dinner at the table waiting. No, he is not a stay at home dad. He works a stressful high security job dealing with government stuff. When I met my husband he was raising 2 special needs girls.. alone. Lauren is his daughter.. Lauren's half sister is Maddie. Maddie's father is unknown.. If you ask my husband he says she belongs to him. He cooked, shopped, did laundry and manage the girls appointments and worked.  His family is so supportive but, out of state.  Yes, I married an amazing man. 

So, one of my oldest friends called to check on me the other day. She has celiacs disease. (A disease in which chronic failure to digest food is triggered by hypersensitivity of the small intestine to gluten.) My friend (Sy) she said a lot of really sweet things but, she told me this: You will learn to eat differently while your family eats what you prepared for them out of love. You will find enjoyment in cooking for your family. My therapist says this was good advice.. This keeps you healthy and a chance to live a long healthy life by eating healthy. 

So-- I've done just that. Cooking for my family all while I am feeling full from my 1/8 of cup of food. Thanks Sy for speaking truth to me.

Order me a Cheeseburger with chips and salsa please!

So.. I have had a cheeseburger on my mind lately. I can tell you the last time I went to Five Guys and experienced their burger. (a Friday in May) I am not even a burger fan but, I want one. After researching-- I decided that I would meet John at Chili's for dinner before therapy.  I was not going to blog about it because no one would know I was there. But, was I wrong. One of my staff members was there. I had a couple bites of John's grill chicken... Then the immense guilt came over me. I stopped (and we had planned me eating some chicken all along at dinner). It's how cheating occurs. It feels wrong at first then it gets easier. I want every food decision to be thought out.  One day. One step. 

I think my body is ready for surgery. I am losing a little more than a pound a day. I've lost 17 pounds thus far- I am having to space out my meals and liquid intake.. Today my insurance called and asked if I was ready for surgery. She asked a series of questions.. Are you depressed? suicidal? your routine different? I laughed I said you mean am I surviving without food? She laughed. We are going to be okay. 

We also know that my family has a history of malignant hypothermia. I have spent some time today researching since the medical records I have were from 1986!! If you ever go alone and visit Granny Duckett she will tell you about Johnnie. Johnnie was born a few years after dad. Johnnie went to have his tonsils out in 1961 and had a allergic reaction to the anesthetic and he died. Not sure how but, we later learned that my grandparents were carriers of MH. (very rare for both parents to carry it- I think that was God's way of not letting them blame each other). So, after some further testing it was discovered that our family is MH susceptible. The information I learned about today was really cool but, I want to share the info with my family first.  As I am always reminded Genetic Testing is rapidly changing!  MH while it is rare- as long as the hospital is aware then the proper medication  can be available if you have a reaction. 

So day 10. If I am being honest and I am... I am ready for day 14. A new chance at life. And if you get a chance eat a burger for me. ;)