Why I skipped Christmas Cards this year

I didn't send out 1 Christmas card this year. I didn't really have a great family photo and figured no one would miss us this year. But, I missed us this year. So, here is my electronic greeting card. A picture can't describe what 2013 meant to John and I. 

Our family's hardest moment of 2013 was in February when Maddie went into septic shock and we spent some time in ICU. It was a bleak time for us. I (Rhonda) remember a few days later, I sat in her room and we waited for her blood pressure to basically come back. It was a moment where God showed us that this child is not ours-she belongs to God. 


Maddie survived. She was in the hospital a lot but, now she is doing well now. Life is different. She lives in Pediatric Nursing Home Care in North Little Rock. We thought her coming home was going to be an option. But, we have learned that her health is fragile and can turn on a dime. She needs full time nursing assistance that John and I can't provide. The great news is she is happy and doing better than she has done in a while. She is in a protected environment and she is not exposed to much. She still wins the hearts of many with her killer smile. Maddie has sotos syndrome and with additional diagnosis of severe sinus problems, epilepsy and developmental delay.

Lauren is 9 and she has continued to thrive. Lauren has autism. Lauren joined i Can! Dance team this year. She loves dancing!She is still quite the electronics guru! She is currently learning about videoing (everything!) on her iPad. Lauren counts to 30. She knows her ABC's and with the use of her talker she is on a preschool level. Lots of improvement. Lauren participated in Special Olympics Bowling this year! She is happy and loves to travel with us. Lauren attended Camp Barnabas and Camp Aldersgate this year.

If you read this blog, you know I had weight loss surgery in the summer.I also started back to school and will finish in Spring 2014. Surgery, along with working out and therapy has improved my quality of life so much! John joined community band. He enjoys his music. We returned to Seattle to see John's family this past year in the Spring. We enjoyed the trip and needed the time away. John spent some time in Seattle again before Christmas too. 

We have a lot planned for 2014 including mailing out Christmas Cards. Till then follow this blog and keep in touch with the Bensen's.

My brother and I lose weight in 2013!

We have had a lot of family time recently. Thanksgiving, Wedding extravaganza, Christmas and the actually wedding was all in the past few months. I am not complaining. It’s a special time and it’s been fun. A year ago during Christmas I shared with my family that I was going to have weight loss surgery.  Many folks do not share because of the “back lash” or lack of support but, I felt that this battle needed my family's support and I didn’t want to mislead anyone. My family was supportive but, my brother will tell you he was apprehensive. I shared with him that losing weight is a journey that lots of people take- some of us will succeed and some will fail. All of us will take different roads to get our results. No road is “easy”. My brother was 298 pounds last Christmas. He really didn’t have room to judge and he knew it. Being fat sucks. 

So, he left that Christmas and made some decisions. He started working out, changed his eating and got with his PCP to help create a plan for him to lose weight. I think he wanted to show me he could do it. He did it. He lost over 75 pounds. He looks fantastic.

My Brother Kyle and I lost a combine total of  170 pounds in 2013!

The New Year is a time when lots of people make goals and jump on the bandwagon to lose weight. I support getting healthy. Some people need medication; some people need weight watchers, some people need to get moving and some people need surgery. I support it all. My life has greatly improved..

 Everyone says I look better but, more than anything I feel so much better. I was in bad shape a year ago. I was weighing in at over 350 pounds. My feet hurt so bad- I was sick on antibiotics 3 times last November and December. My breathing was labored and I was developing asthma. I had no energy and felt exhausted much of the time. My life was leaving me in the dust. I was really too fat to work out. Let's be honest I had a big amount of weight to lose!

Today, I do not diet. I had a lifestyle change. I did use phentermine for 6 months and lost 13 pounds. I know many people who lost weight with phentermine, hormone injections or shakes. I think I would have been more successful had I done a few things differently. Weight loss plans like weight watchers are proven to be a great tool. Working out is also a great tool. All these things are tools. Tools to help you be healthy and feel better. These tools do not work if you don’t make a decision to eat better.

My brother and my family are supportive. I am blessed without a doubt! They know that losing weight is hard and it's challenging. It's a mental game as much as a physical game. I didn’t just have a surgery and lose weight. Therapy along with working out and some other life styles changes was important key to my success. 

You can have a getting healthy story like Kyle and I have by next Christmas. It’s not going to be easy but, I promise you it will be worth it. I guess it’s only fitting that my brother gave me scales for Christmas. He knows I will not be offended and use the precious gift. It’s all fancy and tells me I have not drinking enough water. Ha!  

Losing weight isn’t easy. If it were, everyone would be doing it. The most important thing you can do for yourself today is to live a healthy, active lifestyle. Remember, weight loss is not a race but a marathon. Our bodies, our minds, our lives are meant to be filled with balance. Learn from us and get motivated to change your lifestyle in the New Year.  Cheers to 2014 and to your life being better.

the holidays and weight loss

Well, the month of December has been fast and furious. Physically, emotionally, mentally and personally just busy and too much going on... This is life! I feel like my weight loss is creeping. I am ready to meet goal. I am within 5 pounds of losing 100 pounds and dang it is being really slow. I want to bitch and complain but, I know that deep down I am doing great. I am successful. I feel amazing. But, the devil is playing games with me. Maybe I am destine to only lose 95 pounds. Then my family says uh, Rhonda 95 pounds in 5 months - is great!



Confession: I had 3 sips of  wine. It didn't hurt, I didn't die and I wasn't drunk. All things people warn you about. I also had several sips of soda. It didn't hurt. I didn't die. I still lost weight in spite of my few sips. Again people told me horrendous stories about soda. I had birthday cake for my sisters birthday. I was sick in the bathroom for 2 hours. I couldn't sleep. Death sounded good. NO MORE BIRTHDAY CAKE. It's the holidays people bring you candy, cookies, chocolate covered pretzels... All things that are tasty in moderation. I could live on white chocolate pretzels.  John (my hubby) traveled to his moms this month and brough back Macy's Franco chocolate. It was delish. Do you know that those little bitty chocolates have over 50 calories a pop. No thank you.   Working out has been challenging due to work, life and holidays. I will get back to it after the holidays. I miss it!!  I am struggling with my ADHD meds. I am not a fan of this patch. I am not used to it.



Results..
I have lost  over 12 inches in my chest (underneath the boobies). I have lost over 10 inches in my hips and belly. I have lost over 7 inches in every other part of my body.  I have essentially lost the weight of one of my kids.  I was "busting" out of a 26/28 in July and I am wearing a 18/20. I have not worn an 18/20 in this decade!!! As you know in January at my weight in I was 353. Today, I am in the bottom of the 250s.

Losing weight with or without surgery over the holidays is tough! But, I am hear to say, I am not done. Not even close. We are almost to the half way point. It's going to be hard but, I know together with my friends and family I can do this!!!! Thank you for following my journey with my family and my weight loss. I hope your Christmas is blessed and you are able to find the real meaning of Christmas. (Hint: it's not food or presents!) 

Love, 
Mama Bensen and her crazy family

Small Business Saturday..

Growing up in a small town, I feel like I have a real understanding of the importance of Small Business Saturday. My parents also have several small businesses that many of my friends "back home" support. Thank you for supporting our family whether it be through storing junk at the storage unit (A-1 Storage), washing your car at the car wash (Splash) or getting gas or snack The Corner Convenience Store.

Small Business Saturday is an American shopping holiday held on the Saturday after Thanksgiving during one of the busiest shopping periods of the year. 

I feel like I need to give a special shout of to one of my favorite small businesses in Cabot.  If you live in a small town it's easy to distinguish the corporate from the local. One of my favorite places in Cabot is Christie's Consignment Shoppe. I sell lots of stuff there and buy lots of stuff there. Lots of my clothes during my transition through clothing have come from there. 

I encourage you to give a shout out to your favorite small business today. They depend on YOU! 

A time to be thankful!

The holidays have arrived! Like so many I have so much to be thankful this year. I bring to you.. 

10.  Remembering last year's Thanksgiving.. Maddie had been to the ER twice and already had one hospitalization. The one in November was related to strep that moved in to her mouth. We were in the hospital for several days over that. We thought that was the worst thing ever. As most of you know, through many more ER visits and hospitalizations and our time in ICU that we learned that truly each day with Maddie is a gift.  We continue to be thankful for Arkansas Pediatric Facility, our doctors at Arkansas Children's Hospital and our for Maddie's extra time on life.  (I should also be thankful that God put my friend Angie in my life. She introduced us to APF! She has been an incredible for to me.)


9.  I spend many hours of my day at Aftercare Express. I have a great staff that I work with each day. I have a really supportive board that I report on a regular basis. We are also blessed to have so many awesome families in our program. Each day, 70 kids come to AfterCare Express (after school program) and we hope that each child feels loved, inspired, maybe learns something and experience Jesus. What a super cool thing God is doing at ACE. Glad he has me there. There is a saying "A chain in only as strong as its weakest link".. I am thankful for a team of people who work together and help us especially in our times of weakness.   They also keep me feeling young and hip. 


8. I am so thankful for each of the 89 pounds I have lost this year. I am thankful for each of those pesky 14 BMI points I have lost along the way too. 

7. Speaking of, I can be thankful without mentioning my supportive friends, family and medical people. I hear stories of people who have weight loss surgery and their family doesn't support them. I am blessed beyond belief. My family is cheering loud and clear and my husband is awesome. I am not sure that I would be successful without support of each of you! Each step- the therapy, working out, learning to eat again has been vital in me becoming a healthier person. 

6.  My husband. John is an incredible man- I think he is crazy but, I am grateful God placed him and his family in my life. 


5.  Lauren Emma-Claire. This child teaches me so much about life. I didn't ever know much about "children with autism" but, I have learned a lot from this kiddo. She has taught me the meaning of "unconditional love". If you work or know someone with Autism please check out the book called The Reason I Jump.  “The Chicago Tribune says this "Please don’t assume that The Reason I Jump is just another book for the crowded autism shelf. . . . This is an intimate book, one that brings readers right into an autistic mind—what it’s like without boundaries of time, why cues and prompts are necessary, and why it’s so impossible to hold someone else’s hand. Of course, there’s a wide range of behavior here; that’s why ‘on the spectrum’ has become such a popular phrase. But by listening to this voice, we can understand its echoes."  If you have a nook I would be happy to "loan" it to you. Your local library should have it to. It's a short read! 


4.  Our whole family is so thankful for Camp Aldersgate and Camp Barnabas! Lauren loves camp and the friends she has met there have been such a blessing!!!!!! Thank you to each of my friends who support these great organizations. Both of these camps are geared toward special needs kiddos. 

3. This is hard to admit. I am thankful for my aware of my brokenness.  My brokenness continues to humble me. A lot of days I feel like I am in a battle with the “I have it all together” mentality.  This insane thought that I might actually have all my ducks in a row- You guys all know through my blogging that is not true.  A friend/pastor one time asked me what I needed during some difficult times. I told the friend I was sick and tired of "Christian" people saying: God won’t give you more than you can handle. She says that is such a stupid cliché!  Anyways, I went on to read this blog and thought it was so helpful for those of you might be tired of the cliché. Anyways, I went on to read this blog and thought is was so helpful for those of you might be tired of the cliche. I know people mean well.....  Click here to read it. 

2. I am thankful that I live in a country where people get upset that people are shopping on Thanksgiving or people think you have to eat massive meals to have a real thanksgiving or as I call those first world problems. I get both sides of the great shopping debate. People love a good bargain whether it be through coupon(ing) or holiday sales.. Where do you draw the line????? I don't know and frankly, not sure I care. I care more about helping those who didn't have food on Thanksgiving. I love Cabot Community Thanksgiving (Click here to read about it). What does the bible say about helping the less fortunate? Actually, a lot- check out some verses here. 

1.  I am thankful for the verse Jeremiah 29:11. God understood his plan for me long before I did. Thank goodness! 






I hope you had a nice thanksgiving with those who you love. Whether it be eating yourself into gluttony, shopping for bargains, playing games with your siblings or going to the movies or whatever you did.. I hope you don't forget to be thankful for blessings in your life! 

Thank you for reading my blog!

Mama Rho